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[b3l13v3r]

bismillAH arahamn araheem


This is for the requiems, the sonnets, the dead peacekeepers
the sounds of the towel hitting the canvas, the heater sprayed with paint
the cries of the human fishes and the misdemeanours in distress
harbours breached,broached and the sails winds turning
navigating without a compass like friendly fire mourning
words like canopies illustrating passages with an absract
harnessing crops but battling in the cold till they backtrack
this is the sonar of a young girl wailing as her feet leave the ground
the virtue of a man trying to swim till he drowns
these are contemporary memories for bilateral adversaries
trapped in a logarithm designed by merceneraies and orbitting imagery

[b3l13v3r]

Bismillah aRahman aRaheem

i close my eyes just to be brought to old streets and views
old friends walking paralell ,stop but mind's left the haunt
don't remember what comes next , i'm still pressing for what's gone
the ebb that mired, the window- rollled- down- schizophrenic conversation that never transpired
running backwards like a juggernaut shouting at the rubble on the floor
wanting it to notice the changes, the ironed out weaknesses
helpless as the walls stop breaking, the head starts aching
vertical projectiles taking over, hands flaying, sunk waist downwards in deep sand
memories from years ago turned upside down till the hours break the glass again
like a you never know but the death recurring in the same dream replayed by a mind with its own remote
awakening to move through the rubber legs and look at the mirror at the scars that never healed
the eyes that blinked less, the hair that grew to cover the nest
the epiloue scene that ends the acrimonious analysis of a recurring dream

[t0xy]

words dont come as easy anymore
but no drink no weed to hide what i saw
i feel myself slippin, letting go, falling down
feel nothing as my heart hits the ground.

i dont deserve it, its one thing after the other
musings of a shadow who has no mirror
to see what i feel, its clear isnt it
so why the fuck does it hurt like this

close my eyes and im back in the place
haunted by her presence, her never changing face
i thought i escaped....
ran, and then ran again.
out of the pan and into the fire.

i needed to live i needed to breath
and i though i did, i thought i was free
but now i feel the weight on my shoulders
im still livng a lie and thats fine by me
because there is no room for who i am
in this new life when it began,
i can go along, i can pass the years
i just want this to stop, i want these to heal
my scars are strangling me
making my nightmares real.

[sweetmuslimah]

How could you do that to yourself?
Just thinking about you wealth
How could you stand there and deny?
Deny your only deity
Where has your faith gone?
It was beautiful when it once shone
How could let go of your prayers?
Go against the messenger’s sayings
How could you do that to yourself?
To darken your heart, full of lies and falsehood
Don’t you treasure you book
And the words you once took
Just believe, believe in Him
Surely you will please
Oh astray one don’t wait until you regret
Follow the rules that were set.

[b3l13v3r]

Bismillah AA

i aint got a self concieved notion of where this is heading
i aint retrospectively picking up any crumbs or smelling your essence
ima just go with the flow and spread the talons
carry on till i scratched the shell,
till the walls emblazoned with foam
till the pretty patterns speak a thousand tells
till the wash out leaves behind no reminder
blanked out like a canvas with no imprints
and all ur staring at is poisoned air
exhaling every propellant that was ever near

[b3l13v3r]

Bismillah AA

Slipping and holding onto a ledge that's about to give way
kicking forward to find a firmer grip to see the light of day
delaying the drop onto leaves which don't break the fall
the thud to the head, knees grazed, wretching sound of bones breaking
lying in a stream of body's choosing, the pain overcoming every other emotion
disconnected messages circulating from brain to head,
not able to distinguish what's past and what's being said
drowning into a sea of alternating realities
switching from one wall to the other side of the door
the dreams getting realer, sudden bolt to the shoulders
the thoughts only getting deeper, in every person i can see her
close my eyes again and i'm with her
located the missing item that was missing
the soundtrack beginning to roll, this is the end of the mission
the end of running down the escalators that keep coming
walk away now, as they draw the curtains in
still lying down, unperturbed by the sight from behind
eyes awaken, with no recollection of anything
only the sentiment and wave that were briefly something

[b3l13v3r]

bismillah arahman araheem

this is for the fixated lips
the hidden anagrams with the lipless kiss
this is memory of otter men delights
spiced with remnants of earlier bites
the boxes drawn with nothing but card
medusa like gazes turning onlookers motionless with boredom
this aint nothing but sharing true loves first kiss
the passion within, turning the insides cold with sin
the mouth gorging on fruit recognised by marks
the mind retuning to a state of fanged darts
feeling the warm the taste brings
the tingling and the sour things
the things that don't dissapear with night or day
but stay with you when there's jack shit left to say

[b3l13v3r]

bismillah AA

I got up by the noise and then see leaving the door
i get up and follow the trail of the fleeting
knee length dragging across the floor
i go down some passage i aint come across before
cobwebs either side, flying sticks attracted to the lantern
following the light, can't see the sheet nomore
deeper, the stairs aren't ending,
brief landing, before the spiral keeps on going
scribblings i aint written but somethings familiar
i recognise the words, they dotted all over
i cant join them together, i trip on a sword
the steps getting narrower, now there's pictures on the wall
portraits i recognise, the eyes, the smile , all bringing the same feelin
holding on to the barbed wire on either side to keep from slipping
the lights gone, i run back up the steps, ducking from the rocks
the doors blown shut, i try pounding and kicking it down
opens and knocks me down, head first on each concrete block
i look up and see the eyes, the pale palour bringing out the expression more
this is time i been awaiting, pocket empties something sharp and brings closure

[b3l13v3r]

bismillah arahman araheem

spare seat on the bench, wind wailing away
eye meet briefly till they end up staring at the sky
earphones in but they aint plugged in
listening to the conversation but there aint noone on the reciever
eyes meet again, some colour in the eyes before return to norm
eyes back to the floor, throat cleared, hands shaking with the cold
nobody talks, leaves drop, squirrels hang from branches
heartbeats aint racing, they frozen, the smell in the air is poison
nobody moves up to go, the moment doesn't need background vocals
it's nearly the final stop, only one em moves towards the exit
The clock chimes, backpack on, valuable left behind

[b3l13v3r]

bismillah arahman araheem

just another voice amongst the hundreds running through the scans
if u stepped in rank with twenty others could i read between the lines
if u dssapeared into the landscape, to another blurry dot
could you pick the right colour and wave at the right note
dust in my eyes and reachimg out, can u differentiate
between your arm and a a stone on a slate
when the alarm sirenz blaze could you be found amongst the hundreds others
tick tocking, il leave my watch on your wrist to remember this date
running away as the smog fills the background, smothering any sounds
to remember this moment, this day and this memory
this answer i recieved to these questions, this beat that won't fade away
ima step forward now, il take my cap off, raise my head a little
brush your shoulders as i walk past, just another stranger walking by